Oy Christmas Tree!

Post Xmas, plastic Christmas trees are hugely discounted. Peter says,
that over a 10 year period, you could save $700 investing in a plastic tree
as opposed to buying a freshly cut tree, year after year.

Furthermore, Peter argues, the 100, 000 people employed,
farming Christmas trees could better utilized in service industries
such as health care and border guards armed with Uzis.

Peter gasps over the wholesale pillage nature suffers
due to this fairy tale we call Santa-hood, of which adults
have been conning children for generations.

Peter explains, that plastic trees have the added advantage
their boughs can be used as toilet brushes, and returned
in virtually prime condition to the trees stored in our attics.

I propose a counter argue; man was meant to farm
corn, pine, whatever. Whatever being, let's legalize cannabis
once and for all for Pete's sake, and while we're at it,

what say, we LSD the eggnog in the august halls of Congress.
They need it, we deserve it. Watch it, poet, best button your mouth.
You don't want the FBI suspecting you're a terrorist.