The 6-foot Add On

The guys don't mess around like they used to.
There's a new Sheriff in town.
A new management is remodeling the joint.

An A+ is now the minimum passing grade in Conduct.
Anything less is considered an F,
and the Mean Machine will come down to bust your chops

And not just your chops, but those of your buddies.
Don't bother to look around to see who's doing what.
Best keep your eyeson the ground. You know nothing.

One of the boys really screwed up this morning
while Warden Driggsbee discoursed his usual first-thing-Monday crap,
someone accidentally burped.

Immediately, the goons went on alert,
As a result, we're all gonna pay the tab.
No one's sure it was even O'Neill who had the accident.

Three times a day, after meals, we usually get to walk the lounge,
a cage 10 feet by 30. Our cells by contrast are a meager 3 x 3.
It's our only break from the routine designed to numb our senses.

Today, because of the mishap, accidental or not,
we're ordered to remove the laces from our shoes and tie them together,
then tether ourselves to a bar in the lounge.

No more strolls in the lounge this week.
Six feet, instead, in the given direction.
These are humiliations we suffer daily

I ask Officer Jack, if I might be permitted to make inquiry.
"Shoot," ses he. I ask politely,
"How do you guys come up this stuff?"

Ses Officer Jack, "You're pushing the limits, Mister."
Fortunately, Officer Jack goes easy on me this time,
but to illustrate that curiosity has its perils...

"No 6-footer for you, O'Neill,
Three feet should suit you fine!"
You might ask, is this a prison or a day care center?

What kinda jail has inmates shod in sneakers instead of slippers
Are 3-foot laces a bit extreme?
Is there no concern for the potential for suicide?

Precisely!
The more babies aborted,
the less to do in the nursery.